nonelvis: (DW Twelve)
Title: The Very Honoured Guests of the Grelvakian Scientific Society
Characters/Pairing(s): Twelfth Doctor/Clara
Rating: Adult
Word count: 3,763
Spoilers: none
Warnings: none
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] platypus
Summary: "It was a tea shop," the Doctor said. "We were buying some of your local tea as a souvenir. And usually, when I buy the morning cuppa, I'm not expecting anyone to hand me a medical consent form for what I suspect is highly dubious experimentation."

Author's Notes: This is a shag-or-die–ish story, though technically, it doesn't include noncon or dubcon.

::xposted to [community profile] dwfiction and [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, and archived at A Teaspoon And An Open Mind and Archive of Our Own

fic, after the cut )
nonelvis: (MARTINI it's what's for dinner)
Let's not discuss how far over I am on today's calorie allotment, because the truly important thing is that a good third of them went to a martini, my favorite beer, and homemade coconut cream pie:

Coconut cream pie

Happy Fourth of July to my fellow Americans!
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
I'm on another episode of the Reality Bomb podcast, this time talking about how "The Dominators" isn't complete crap, or if it is complete crap, I at least found it enjoyable crap. Look, it's got incredible costumes like this, so obviously it is high-quality Classic Who:



Anyway, give it a listen, and be as grateful to the editors as I am that they saved me from sounding like I couldn't string two words together.
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
It's been bugging me for quite some time that I had 49 kinkmeme stories when clearly 50 was the correct number, but it's literally taken me years to find a prompt that grabbed me. (Not that there aren't still plenty of deserving prompts on [livejournal.com profile] sizeofthatthing; I just have to find the right prompt when I'm in the right mood, or nothing gets written.)

But at last, I found a prompt, and thus I bring you the final story in my kinkmeme collection. It's Eight/Romana II, written for a prompt requesting a creaky motel room bed. As always, there are lightly edited versions on Teaspoon and AO3, with a link to the original and a very brief author's note in my kinkmeme master lists on LJ and Dreamwidth.
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
Really quick-like, because I have to leave to go teach in a minute: I'm a guest on the latest episode of the Reality Bomb podcast, participating in a panel discussion about the Moffat era. Many thanks to Graeme Burk for inviting me on the show, as well as dealing with what was apparently my iPhone's terrible mike quality (THANKS, APPLE).
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
Normally, I'd post this on New Year's Eve, but I'll be out much of tomorrow at Star Wars (again) and a lovely dinner, so you get it tonight instead.

after the cut )
nonelvis: (Default)
Man, tracking what I read on Goodreads sure has made this post easier to compile. (In fact, if you follow me there, you've read all these reviews already.) I made a concerted effort this year to read more books by women and/or non-white folks, and I'm glad I did, because I got points of view and writing styles I might not otherwise encounter. I plan to continue this approach next year.

25 reviews, after the cut )
nonelvis: (DW River Song (FotD))
Title: Near Enough to a Lifetime
Characters/Pairing(s): Twelfth Doctor/River Song
Rating: Adult
Word count: 2,270
Spoilers: through "The Husbands of River Song"; extremely minor reference to setting of "The Boundless Sea" audio
Warnings: none
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] platypus
Summary: The first few hours of night, and the last.
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.

Author's Notes: Many thanks to [livejournal.com profile] platypus for turning around her beta so quickly.

::xposted to [community profile] dwfiction, [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, and [livejournal.com profile] spoiler_song, and archived at A Teaspoon And An Open Mind and Archive of Our Own

after the cut )
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
Title: Soft Jaws, Strong Bite
Characters/Pairing(s): Twelfth Doctor/Romana II
Rating: All ages
Word count: 2,167
Spoilers: None
Warnings: none
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] platypus
Summary: A brief and heartwarming story about the Doctor, Romana, space pirates, and the universe's greatest children's show about prehistoric reptile cyborgs.
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.

Author's Notes: Written for [livejournal.com profile] who_at_50's 52nd Anniversary Fanwork-A-Thon. Story would have been mostly canon-compliant had "Heaven Sent" not aired yesterday. (Whoops.) Similarly, any resemblance to something the Doctor says near the end of the story to something he says in "Heaven Sent" really is coincidence, as I wrote my story well before "Heaven Sent" aired.

::xposted to [community profile] who_at_50, [livejournal.com profile] who_at_50, [community profile] dwfiction, and [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, and archived at Teaspoon and AO3

fic, after the cut )
nonelvis: (MARTINI it's what's for dinner)
Tonight's menu, listed here for posterity:

  • Sikil pak (Mayan pumpkin seed dip)

  • Pickled carrots

  • Dry-brined turkey

  • Giblet gravy, because the asshole cats wouldn't eat the giblets I lovingly hand-cooked for them

  • WHAT KIND OF SELF-RESPECTING CAT TURNS DOWN FRESH LIVER AND HEART I ASK YOU

  • Chickpea cutlets with sriracha cashew cream

  • Garlic mashed potatoes with fried shallots

  • Roasted brussels sprouts

  • Cornbread dressing

  • Cranberry sauce

  • Brioche rolls

  • Gluten-free spinach and feta bread

  • Black-bottom pumpkin chiffon pie

  • Spiced pumpkin-seed brittle

  • Gluten-free pumpkin and chocolate whoopie pies

  • Lemongrass limeade, which mixed very nicely with the homemade gin



I am a little bit full right now.
nonelvis: (SANDMAN making little frogs)
I would title this post "burying the lede," but honestly, there's no point in it; might as well just say it, which is that yesterday I submitted an original story to Uncanny Magazine for publication. Honestly, I don't expect them to buy it, because the odds are always against slushpile entries. But you never know -- it's spelled and punctuated correctly, which is probably better than some entries they get; it's a story that "make[s] you feel," which is the type of stuff they're after; and who knows, maybe now that they've hit their Kickstarter stretch goal of an extra story per issue, they'll be open to giving unpublished authors a shot. (I did mention my published nonfiction in my cover letter, but I have no published fiction, which is probably what they most care about.)

So anyway, that happened, and the final story prep and submission was utterly terrifying, but I did it. I should hear back in about a month, although they say authors should contact them if they haven't heard back in 45 days. And I suppose if it doesn't sell to Uncanny, I can always try another market.

Other things: I have a new lead at work that is basically already sold without my having to do a damned thing, as well as a possible small continuation of an existing project. I still need to send out marketing email Real Soon Now, but because last year was such a financial disaster, we are actually owed a huge refund on our taxes (GOD BLESS CPAs) that we will apply to next year's taxes, which makes it much easier to coast by over the next few months.

Also, we had an utterly lovely day today. some photos and video after the cut )

AO3 meme

Aug. 14th, 2015 11:51 am
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
Why the hell not, I've got some time today, and this has started going around the flist:

I currently have 56 works archived at the AO3. Pick a number from 1 (the most recent) to 56 (the first thing I posted there), and I'll tell you three things I currently like about it.
nonelvis: (DW Twelve)
Title: The Girl Who's Got Your Number
Characters/Pairing(s): Twelfth Doctor/Clara Oswald, Twelfth Doctor/Missy, Twelfth Doctor/Clara/Missy
Rating: Adult
Word count: 10,867
Spoilers: through "Last Christmas"
Warnings: none
Contains: breathplay, glove kink, attempted murder
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] platypus
Summary: Who's pushing you too far now, Clara Oswald?
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.

Author's Notes: Story contains some dialogue from "Listen" and "The Caretaker." Many thanks to [livejournal.com profile] platypus for her help pinpointing some issues with the story. Any remaining ones are entirely my fault.

::xposted to [community profile] dwfiction and [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, and archived at Teaspoon and AO3

after the cut )
nonelvis: (DW River Song (FotD))
Title: Sex Storm
Characters/Pairing(s): Twelfth Doctor/River Song
Rating: Adult
Word count: 3,400
Spoilers: none
Warnings: none
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] platypus
Summary: Somehow, it took the Doctor three weeks to deliver Clara's coffee. Well, he did say he got distracted ...
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.

Author's Notes: I blame RTD for the title. The terrible wordplay that follows, however, is all mine.

::xposted to [community profile] dwfiction, [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, and [livejournal.com profile] spoiler_song, and archived at Teaspoon and AO3

fic, after the cut )
nonelvis: (DW Twelve)
Title: Last Hurrah
Characters/Pairing(s): Twelfth Doctor/Clara Oswald
Rating: Adult
Word count: 2,665
Spoilers: through "Mummy on the Orient Express"
Warnings: none
Beta: [livejournal.com profile] platypus
Summary: Clara fidgeted in the corridor outside the Doctor's cabin on the Orient Express, shifting from one foot to another. "So," she said, "last hurrah."
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.

Author's Notes: Many thanks to my beta, [livejournal.com profile] platypus, for her invaluable help fixing issues with this story.

::xposted to [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, [community profile] dwfiction, and [livejournal.com profile] clara_who, and archived at Teaspoon and AO3

fic, after the cut )
nonelvis: (MARTINI it's what's for dinner)
I think I mentioned a little while back that I was going to try making gin, but I never reported back. The results: FANTASTIC. Making gin is trivially easy, and we're now on our second bottle of the stuff.

Here it is steeping:

Gin in progress

That's a fifth, so next time, I think I'll get a couple of bottles and just fill the jar.

We tried it first with regular-proof vodka, but as the house gin is Bombay Sapphire (94 proof), 80-proof gin felt a little weak in a martini. This second batch was made with Smirnoff's 100-proof vodka, and is somewhat smoother.

I started off with Serious Eats' recipe, but made a few minor modifications to suit our taste: no lavender, and I added some black peppercorns. For 1 bottle of 100-proof vodka, I used:

3T juniper berries
1.5 chamomile teabags
1 big strip (about 6") grapefruit peel, and the same of lime peel
26 peppercorns
1.5 bay leaves
3/4 t coriander seed
5 crushed cardamom pods
6 allspice berries

Steep the juniper in the vodka alone for 12 hours, then put everything else in and steep for another 36 hours. Strain and enjoy (and trust me, you will enjoy).

Fic meme

Mar. 18th, 2015 07:24 pm
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
Since it's been a little while since I last posted, why not have a meme I'm also participating in on Tumblr? I've got time tonight, what the hell. (Tomorrow, of course, it's back to the teaching/wireframing mines.)

Ask me questions about writing.

1. Which is your favorite of the fics you've written for X fandom?
2. Favorite piece overall?
3. Which was the hardest to write, in terms of plot?
4. Which has the most "you" in it, however you'd define that?
5. What is an image/set of images that you're particularly proud of?
6. Idea that you always wanted to write but could never make work?
7. Least favorite plot point/chapter/moment?
8. Favorite plot point/chapter/moment?
9. Favorite character to write?
10. Favorite line or lines of dialogue that you've written
11. If I'm showing off just one of your pieces to someone, which one should it be?
12. What WIPs do you have going now? Are you excited about them?
13. Are there any things that might have happened in any of your stories, but you changed them at the last minute? (So-and-so dies, they don't actually kiss, main character has long extended ballet-based dream sequence, etc.)
14. Would you want to write canon for any of your fandoms (like be hired by showrunner to do an episode)? Which one?
15. Does font matter to you when you're writing a draft?
16. 3 favorite comments ever received on fanfic.
17. Any mean comments? How'd you deal with it? Who laid the smackdown?
18. If you could go back and revise one of your older stories, which would it be?
19. Do you make up scenes at work/on the bus/at the gym? Who are the characters that pop up the most? Do you write them down?
20. Go nuts, and talk about writing.
nonelvis: (DT oh shit)
Title: *hic*
Author: [personal profile] nonelvis
Characters/Pairing(s): Tenth Doctor/Jackie Tyler
Rating: Teen
Word count: 3,198
Warnings: slight dubcon (shag-or-die scenario)
Prompt: "Ten/Jackie Tyler I DON'T CARE I JUST NEED THIS OKAY," from [personal profile] nostalgia
Betas: [livejournal.com profile] platypus and [livejournal.com profile] violetisblue
Summary: The Doctor woke in a TARDIS guest room, featureless other than the silver-sheeted double bed on which he was reclining with Jackie Tyler.
Disclaimer: Not mine, obviously.

Author's Notes: Written for the [community profile] onlyonebed Bed-Sharing Fic Fest, although the story includes shag-or-die as much as bed-sharing. Huge thanks to my betas [livejournal.com profile] platypus and [livejournal.com profile] violetisblue, without whom this story would be creepy and unfinished.

::xposted to [community profile] onlyonebed, [livejournal.com profile] onlyonebed, [livejournal.com profile] dwfiction, and [community profile] dwfiction, and archived at Teaspoon and AO3

fic, after the cut )
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
… I'm on today's Verity! podcast about fanworks. I've been enjoying Verity! since its very first recording, so I was delighted to be invited on to talk about Teaspoon and fanworks in general. Hope you enjoy it as much as I did.
nonelvis: (DW blue TARDIS)
Companion Piece cover

(xposted from Tumblr)

Things I am hugely excited about: this book, and not just because two dear friends of mine edited it. No, I am also hugely excited because I AM IN IT, writing about how Zoe and Liz are amazing women of science. There are also authors you've probably heard of, like Seanan McGuire and Mary Robinette Kowal, among others, but let's face it: you're buying this for me, right? Of course you are.

Complete TOC: after the cut )

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