nonelvis | (no subject)

(no subject)

OH MY GOD THERE IS SOMETHING IN OUR LIVING ROOM THAT BEEPS RANDOMLY ONCE A DAY AND I HAVE NO GODDAMNED CLUE WHAT IT IS.

It's probably whatever needs the suction cup. Either that, or a phone tap from the FBI and NSA. Hi, guys! What, Echelon wasn't good enough for you?

I'm going to bed now before anything else in my home appears out of thin air or attempts to report me to a government agency.

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You have my utter sympathy. We had a random beeping that started about midnight a few months back and it took me days to find it. Turned out to be the clock on our shower radio.

It really is random, and I don't even hear it every day. (Though I suppose it could be going off at 3am on the days I'm not hearing it.) It's probably one of the miscellaneous pieces of video equipment in that corner of the living room, but hell if I know which one.

1. I once had an old iPod that would beep at midnight every night. (I think Lunchboy had the same problem.)

2. More likely: There was something at work doing that for the longest time. I scoured the place and found nothing. The culprit? It was a damn smoke detector with a dying battery.

I wonder if it's one of these:

http://www.thinkgeek.com/gadgets/electronic/8c52/

My iPod used to randomly ping at midnight if I'd left it on, or it got accidentally turned on because I failed to flick the lock button. (The alarm had gotten set somehow.) Drove me crazy until I figured it out (because it went off once in a hotel room).

Wow, you have a good memory for old blog posts.

Smoke detector with low battery?

Nope, doesn't beep often enough.

My first thought was smoke detector, because there are a couple within earshot of the living room, but when their batteries are low, they beep more regularly.

I haven't checked the iPod, since I don't use its alarm and the sound isn't coming from that direction, but you never know ... maybe I should go have a look.

I don't use the iPod alarm, but I think I'll go check on it this morning anyway, just in case.

You'd think that, but our smoke detectors beep more regularly when they're dying -- this is literally once a day at most, and it doesn't sound like it's coming from either detector.

Does one of your new-fangled gadgets use electric power for most of its functions, and batteries for other parts? Maybe the gadget is smart enough to ping you when the non-essential or backup batteries are dying.

You know, I moved into the house in June, and there was this one wall switch that didn't do anything when I flipped it. So every once in a while when I went past it, I'd give it a flip. After two months, I got a call from a woman in Germany telling me to cut it out.

(That's one of my favorite Steven Wright jokes.)

Hmm, that's another good suggestion, since it wasn't the iPod. I hadn't thought the noise was coming from the phone, but that's the only device in the living room I can think of that uses a battery backup.

I think there's a Visa or Mastercard commercial that uses the same premise -- the guy keeps flipping the switch, and it controls his neighbor's garage door, causing it to repeatedly crunch the hood of his car.

That was a Friends episode, too.

After Monica and Rachel had to switch apartments with Joey and Chandler, Monica discovered a switch that did nothing. I think she ended up tearing the wall apart to figure it out. I think it controlled an electrical outlet in her old place? (Was that the one where Phoebe was turning the TV on and off with her mind?)

My old house had loads of Mystery Switches. It was over 250 years old, and the people who had wired it were on some sort of crazy juice. There were switches that controlled stuff in other rooms, and one or two that did nothing at all. Plus an electrical outlet about eight feet from the floor.

You lived in a 250-year-old house! That's beyond cool. Mine's only 130 years old. [Pouts with envy.]

You win for weird electricity. We've got some really old stuff in the house -- some knob and tube wiring the home inspector thought was probably original wiring from 1910 -- but nothing nearly as weird as an outlet 8' off the ground. What the hell was someone thinking?

I don't live there anymore, sadly. We were just renting. It was built in 1752, and had thick stone walls and these amazing windows. I really loved it, but it was too expensive. It was impossible to heat properly, because of the walls, and because a previous owner had cut out the ceilings in the dining room and attic, so all the heat would go right upstairs. Plus, the fireplace never worked properly. It was always freezing!

But I loved it, and I miss it. Luckily, I'm friends with the owner, so I can visit it once in a while. He rents it out short-term, so if you want to go to Quebec City and need a place to stay, let me know, I'll hook you up!

Wow, I'm putting that in my Long-Term Perishables file. I love Quebec City, especially the old part of town. If I remember my history, your old house must have been a new construction at the time of Wolfe and Montcalm. If I get up there again, I may well take you up on it. Thanks!

P.S. The one major thing I did when I got the house was to get the chimneys open and up to code and get five of the fireplaces working (and also up to code). I'm very glad I did so.

P.P.S. With the big open ceilings, you might want to suggest to your friend that he install an extractor fan with reverse capabilities at the top of the house -- in winter it can push hot air down, and in the summer it can pull cool air up. It's on my amazingly long list of things I'd like to put into my house when free cash permits.

P.P.S. With the big open ceilings, you might want to suggest to your friend that he install an extractor fan with reverse capabilities at the top of the house -- in winter it can push hot air down, and in the summer it can pull cool air up. It's on my amazingly long list of things I'd like to put into my house when free cash permits.

You're hot when you talk like a hardcore homeowner.

Outlets 8' off the ground aren't all that uncommon. Have you ever stopped to think about the height of the one we plug our refrigerator into?

Have you ever stopped to think about the height of the one we plug our refrigerator into?

To jump to

nonelvis's defense -- it's probably behind the refrigerator. ;)

We had a mysterious late-night beep a while back. It turned out to be a shitty little novelty clock shaped like a robot. It was the favor from my boss's kid's bar mitzvah, and had an alarm function no one knew about because it didn't come with directions. Yet another cause for resentment (the ungrateful brat never sent a thank-you note for our gift, either).

There are no novelty clocks in the living room. The iPod alarm is off and has never been on. The smoke detectors seem fine. I still haven't checked the phone battery, but now my Mac has decided that every so often, it's going to beep when I start scrolling through web pages.

The world is out to get me.

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