See, now I just have this vision of a Dalek using a tea cozy because he thinks it will make him slightly less conspicuous, and then he can take everyone by surprise. And then this tea-cozy'd Dalek appears out of nowhere at, say, a Hello Kitty convention or a Barbie convention or someplace where one might find a large number of adolescent girls.
DALEK: Exterminate! Exterminate! GIRLS: OMGLookatitHe'ssocuteSQUEEEE! DALEK: I-am-not-cute! I-am-deadly! Ex-ter-mi-nate! (Before he can bring his gun to bear, he's buried under a metric ton of tween.) GIRLS: SQUEE! (at a higher pitch than before) DALEK: I-am-under-attack! Ex-ter-mi-nate! Ex-ter-mi-nate! (Alas, his monocle, or whatever that thing is, is not only buried under tweens but also encased in cozy, and he can't see to shoot.) GIRLS: SQUEEEEEEEE! (Even higher pitch. Dogs for miles around are perking up their ears, followed by that thing they do when they put their paws on their ears to try to block out the sound, only it never works, poor things) DALEK: A-sis-tance is re-quired! Ex-ter-mi-nate! GIRLS: SQUEEEEEEEEE! (Dalek suddenly starts smoking, then its head explodes. Strangely, this does not make it less cute, as the explosion is contained entirely within the cozy.)
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ninetydegrees
no subject
on 2010-09-06 04:11 am (UTC)DALEK: Exterminate! Exterminate!
GIRLS: OMGLookatitHe'ssocuteSQUEEEE!
DALEK: I-am-not-cute! I-am-deadly! Ex-ter-mi-nate!
(Before he can bring his gun to bear, he's buried under a metric ton of tween.)
GIRLS: SQUEE! (at a higher pitch than before)
DALEK: I-am-under-attack! Ex-ter-mi-nate! Ex-ter-mi-nate! (Alas, his monocle, or whatever that thing is, is not only buried under tweens but also encased in cozy, and he can't see to shoot.)
GIRLS: SQUEEEEEEEE! (Even higher pitch. Dogs for miles around are perking up their ears, followed by that thing they do when they put their paws on their ears to try to block out the sound, only it never works, poor things)
DALEK: A-sis-tance is re-quired! Ex-ter-mi-nate!
GIRLS: SQUEEEEEEEEE! (Dalek suddenly starts smoking, then its head explodes. Strangely, this does not make it less cute, as the explosion is contained entirely within the cozy.)