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nonelvisI'm somewhat caught up on Mystery Hunt work for the evening but am strangely distracted and unable to concentrate on either one of the stories I'm trying to write. So, in an almost pointless effort to feel productive, have a comments ficlet I posted elsewhere for a dare to write smut in which the Doctor's parts looked like this photo.
"Rose, before we go any further, there's something I have to tell you. Or, er, show you, I suppose."
"I waited a year for you," Rose said. "I can wait a bit longer." After all, the Doctor had pulled off the impossible, rescuing her from the parallel Earth, and now she was finally in the place she'd been dreaming of for the past three years – his bedroom.
The Doctor stood, one hand at the fly of his trousers, the other scratching nervously at his neck. "You might find this a little different," he began.
"It's okay," Rose said. "I've been with circumcised men before."
The Doctor made a sound halfway between choking and laughter, but finally unzipped his fly, loosing an iridescent blue, ten-inch spiral from his trousers.
"There," he said. "I realise it may seem unusual to you, but I assure you, the Gallifreyan penis is a magnificent and versatile organ, capable of penetrating you, delivering the equivalent of what I daresay would be spectacular oral sex, and providing a soothing buttocks massage, all at the same time."
"Right," said Rose. "Well, this explains a lot about how you could pilot the TARDIS without using your hands."
"Don't be silly," the Doctor replied. "I used my balls for that."
"Rose, before we go any further, there's something I have to tell you. Or, er, show you, I suppose."
"I waited a year for you," Rose said. "I can wait a bit longer." After all, the Doctor had pulled off the impossible, rescuing her from the parallel Earth, and now she was finally in the place she'd been dreaming of for the past three years – his bedroom.
The Doctor stood, one hand at the fly of his trousers, the other scratching nervously at his neck. "You might find this a little different," he began.
"It's okay," Rose said. "I've been with circumcised men before."
The Doctor made a sound halfway between choking and laughter, but finally unzipped his fly, loosing an iridescent blue, ten-inch spiral from his trousers.
"There," he said. "I realise it may seem unusual to you, but I assure you, the Gallifreyan penis is a magnificent and versatile organ, capable of penetrating you, delivering the equivalent of what I daresay would be spectacular oral sex, and providing a soothing buttocks massage, all at the same time."
"Right," said Rose. "Well, this explains a lot about how you could pilot the TARDIS without using your hands."
"Don't be silly," the Doctor replied. "I used my balls for that."